Monday, November 14, 2005
Friday, November 11, 2005
JOURNAL: Noses
A Korean friend pointed out to me something that should have been....well, as plain as the nose on my face, about Koreans and kissing that might explain the mystery (see "Cellphones and Kissing" 10/06/05).
Not being particularly attracted to noses, or for that matter, not having ever even considered noses, I failed to notice that, generally speaking, Asian noses are not as big or deep as Western noses. Once this was mentioned to me, noses became a bit of an obsession. I watched people get on and off the subway to observe this phenomenon, and found it to be rather valid. No big schnozzes, though a few flat and broad ones.
There is no problem with full on straight kissing, then. Westerners have to tilt to kiss because, well, our honkers are big, Roman, pointy, hooked, button, or otherwise less than delicate. Mine seems to exist only to get sunburned or allergies. Noses are not sexy or cute, but they do need consideration when contemplating a sweet end to a romantic evening.
Not being particularly attracted to noses, or for that matter, not having ever even considered noses, I failed to notice that, generally speaking, Asian noses are not as big or deep as Western noses. Once this was mentioned to me, noses became a bit of an obsession. I watched people get on and off the subway to observe this phenomenon, and found it to be rather valid. No big schnozzes, though a few flat and broad ones.
There is no problem with full on straight kissing, then. Westerners have to tilt to kiss because, well, our honkers are big, Roman, pointy, hooked, button, or otherwise less than delicate. Mine seems to exist only to get sunburned or allergies. Noses are not sexy or cute, but they do need consideration when contemplating a sweet end to a romantic evening.
Tuesday, November 08, 2005
JOURNAL: Paying Bills in Korea - A CPA's Worst Nightmare...
Well, if you read this blog tonight, it is only through the good graces of my local PC Bong, as I have no other form of communication at present. You see, something got horribly lost in translation with my phone company. My Internet and phone line have been completely shut off, thanks to KT Telecom's lack of ever sending me a bill. How did this happen? Moreover, shouldn't Rebecca have noticed that she was not getting a phone bill? Well, I was getting a phone bill...and paying it. There is a lesson in this, I just don't know what it is.
My Internet and phone suddenly went goodbye on Monday morning. This happens sporadically, but only one goes out at a time usually. I asked our office manager at work about this. He pretty much acts as interpreter in all things practical, assisting all the foreign teachers in finance, apartment management, and getting along with the locals. I have had a difficult financial month, but he assured me that I had about a month grace period where I didn't have to pay any bills; it is just added to the next month's bill, with no penalty. Although my pride was wounded by the idea of letting debt accrue, I nervously accepted this advice. He said that they would never, in any circumstances, cut off phone, heat, or water unless more than a few months had passed. He said to try my phone and Internet the next morning. So I did. Nothing but a message saying that my number had been temporarily disconnected. No Internet either.
I went to "Joe" again this morning. I brought proof that I had paid my phone bill last month to ONSE Telecom. That is the only bill I have ever seen that has a "Telecom" on it; everything else is in Hangul. I assumed it was my phone bill. It comes about every other month. "Joe" said it was not my regular phone bill, but long distance; this made no sense to me, as I always use a phone card to call the U.S. The bill is never very high (about $20), so I figured it was for local calls. It never occured to me that it was anything other than a regular phone bill, or that in Korea they separate local from international calls.
"Joe" called the phone company, which I later found out was KT Telecom. I have never gotten any bill from this company, except for my Internet Installation fee, which I had paid immediately. They claim (rightly) that I have not paid a phone bill for four months, and that they will not restore service until I pay them 138,000 Won ($132). I have never gotten a bill from them, other than the first, so this stunned me. "Joe" verified that they had the correct address, which they did, but the fact remains that I have never gotten a bill from them. They accused me of never checking my mailbox! This is a ridiculous, as I cannot avoid checking it when I come in the building - it will hit me in the face, as it sticks out of the mail slot in the narrow (Korean-sized) lobby of the building. Also, the adverts will bury you if you don't check your box regularly; they stick them on doors and hang them on doorknobs as well. Great advertising strategy, but subtly annoying.
This gets more complicated (CPA's nightmare)so bear with me. I have exactly 68,000 won to get me through until the 15th, due to a slight, and rather stupid (back to Subtraction 101 for me), miscalculation of my monthly budget. I had planned out how to use every penny, and, were it not for this calamity, would have made it through easily. I usually have a very nice cushion of finance at the end of the month; this is very unusual for me. I also have a credit card, but this is not necessarily an asset in Korea, as credit cards are not widely accepted.
It is no wonder that KT Telecom's figure astounded me. They would not take credit card, and, from the arguing going on, were apparently giving John a hard time on the phone. Unless I deposited the sum right away, no phone service or Internet. Period. I then had one of my ridiculously ill-timed PCA (Public Crying Attacks) because of all the stress. Whichever ancestor passed this odd tendency on to me ought to be horse-whipped; perversely, it only happens when my pride, which I have quite a bit of, is at stake. I felt very cornered by my ill-fortune, and quite frankly have been nervous and embarrassed about my lack of funds all week. Oh, I have joked about it, but it really stung this afternoon. This latest development was just too much for me. I was very aware that I was alone in a strange land, with no money, no options, and the threat of "ugly American" stamped on my defaulted telephone bill.
I asked about cashing traveller's checks or getting money wired to me, but was told this would take 3-4 days. Finally, "Joe" suggested I ask the director of the school for an advance on my salary. This thought was almost too humiliating to bear. It turned out that she was not in her office all day. I finally got the nerve to call her on her cell phone. She was quite gracious about it, aside from a comment about foreigners not checking their mailboxes...This has to be Korean code language/translation for something....maybe it is a rough equivalent of "the check is in the mail..." Apparently, this has happened to other teachers, some to the point of losing both electricity and heat during winter. I shudder at the thought of being lumped in with young, immature people fresh out of college who decide to spend their money on soju and makju (beer) rather than paying bills, but I guess it works to put the final nail in the coffin of what was left of my admittedly occasionally excessive dignity. The money will be deposited in my account tomorrow morning.
Murphy's Law is still in full effect as I sit here and type while courting lung cancer in the smoky PC bong... My cell phone ran out of minutes this evening, so I am completely unreachable by phone for the moment. I bought a new phone card, but then discovered that my cell phone battery was dead. My spare was still plugged into the wall, but mysteriously, was not charged. I sincerely hope I do not have an accident tonight, as I have no means of calling 119 if something happens...
Living in a foreign country makes you humble, as I guess we should all be. South Korea is full of generous and helpful people who will go out of their way to help you even before you have asked for it. Community is strong, and I am finding my niche in it. The restaurant guys on the street greet me and flirt/joke with me everyday (not sure which way it is intended, truthfully), even though we don't always understand each other. The bakery lady where I buy my bread always slips something a little extra in my bag because I performed a random act of kindness for a customer - never mind what it was, it is not important. She also admires my bargain hunting skills, and so we trade fashion secrets of Seoul. The ajuma at my subway stop always takes time to chat with me in her broken English when I stop to buy my phone cards. It is nice to be acknowledged by the people you see everday.
My Internet and phone suddenly went goodbye on Monday morning. This happens sporadically, but only one goes out at a time usually. I asked our office manager at work about this. He pretty much acts as interpreter in all things practical, assisting all the foreign teachers in finance, apartment management, and getting along with the locals. I have had a difficult financial month, but he assured me that I had about a month grace period where I didn't have to pay any bills; it is just added to the next month's bill, with no penalty. Although my pride was wounded by the idea of letting debt accrue, I nervously accepted this advice. He said that they would never, in any circumstances, cut off phone, heat, or water unless more than a few months had passed. He said to try my phone and Internet the next morning. So I did. Nothing but a message saying that my number had been temporarily disconnected. No Internet either.
I went to "Joe" again this morning. I brought proof that I had paid my phone bill last month to ONSE Telecom. That is the only bill I have ever seen that has a "Telecom" on it; everything else is in Hangul. I assumed it was my phone bill. It comes about every other month. "Joe" said it was not my regular phone bill, but long distance; this made no sense to me, as I always use a phone card to call the U.S. The bill is never very high (about $20), so I figured it was for local calls. It never occured to me that it was anything other than a regular phone bill, or that in Korea they separate local from international calls.
"Joe" called the phone company, which I later found out was KT Telecom. I have never gotten any bill from this company, except for my Internet Installation fee, which I had paid immediately. They claim (rightly) that I have not paid a phone bill for four months, and that they will not restore service until I pay them 138,000 Won ($132). I have never gotten a bill from them, other than the first, so this stunned me. "Joe" verified that they had the correct address, which they did, but the fact remains that I have never gotten a bill from them. They accused me of never checking my mailbox! This is a ridiculous, as I cannot avoid checking it when I come in the building - it will hit me in the face, as it sticks out of the mail slot in the narrow (Korean-sized) lobby of the building. Also, the adverts will bury you if you don't check your box regularly; they stick them on doors and hang them on doorknobs as well. Great advertising strategy, but subtly annoying.
This gets more complicated (CPA's nightmare)so bear with me. I have exactly 68,000 won to get me through until the 15th, due to a slight, and rather stupid (back to Subtraction 101 for me), miscalculation of my monthly budget. I had planned out how to use every penny, and, were it not for this calamity, would have made it through easily. I usually have a very nice cushion of finance at the end of the month; this is very unusual for me. I also have a credit card, but this is not necessarily an asset in Korea, as credit cards are not widely accepted.
It is no wonder that KT Telecom's figure astounded me. They would not take credit card, and, from the arguing going on, were apparently giving John a hard time on the phone. Unless I deposited the sum right away, no phone service or Internet. Period. I then had one of my ridiculously ill-timed PCA (Public Crying Attacks) because of all the stress. Whichever ancestor passed this odd tendency on to me ought to be horse-whipped; perversely, it only happens when my pride, which I have quite a bit of, is at stake. I felt very cornered by my ill-fortune, and quite frankly have been nervous and embarrassed about my lack of funds all week. Oh, I have joked about it, but it really stung this afternoon. This latest development was just too much for me. I was very aware that I was alone in a strange land, with no money, no options, and the threat of "ugly American" stamped on my defaulted telephone bill.
I asked about cashing traveller's checks or getting money wired to me, but was told this would take 3-4 days. Finally, "Joe" suggested I ask the director of the school for an advance on my salary. This thought was almost too humiliating to bear. It turned out that she was not in her office all day. I finally got the nerve to call her on her cell phone. She was quite gracious about it, aside from a comment about foreigners not checking their mailboxes...This has to be Korean code language/translation for something....maybe it is a rough equivalent of "the check is in the mail..." Apparently, this has happened to other teachers, some to the point of losing both electricity and heat during winter. I shudder at the thought of being lumped in with young, immature people fresh out of college who decide to spend their money on soju and makju (beer) rather than paying bills, but I guess it works to put the final nail in the coffin of what was left of my admittedly occasionally excessive dignity. The money will be deposited in my account tomorrow morning.
Murphy's Law is still in full effect as I sit here and type while courting lung cancer in the smoky PC bong... My cell phone ran out of minutes this evening, so I am completely unreachable by phone for the moment. I bought a new phone card, but then discovered that my cell phone battery was dead. My spare was still plugged into the wall, but mysteriously, was not charged. I sincerely hope I do not have an accident tonight, as I have no means of calling 119 if something happens...
Living in a foreign country makes you humble, as I guess we should all be. South Korea is full of generous and helpful people who will go out of their way to help you even before you have asked for it. Community is strong, and I am finding my niche in it. The restaurant guys on the street greet me and flirt/joke with me everyday (not sure which way it is intended, truthfully), even though we don't always understand each other. The bakery lady where I buy my bread always slips something a little extra in my bag because I performed a random act of kindness for a customer - never mind what it was, it is not important. She also admires my bargain hunting skills, and so we trade fashion secrets of Seoul. The ajuma at my subway stop always takes time to chat with me in her broken English when I stop to buy my phone cards. It is nice to be acknowledged by the people you see everday.
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